Two People Who Are Kidding Themselves:

Anti-Gay Program V1.5.15

Microsoft's public-relations troubles intensified yesterday as news spread that the company had withdrawn support for state legislation banning discrimination against gays and lesbians.

The legislation, House Bill 1515, was voted down Thursday by a single vote in the state Senate, prompting frustration and anger that continued to build yesterday among some gay-rights activists.

Hung like a chad

"I'm with the Bush-Cheney team, and I'm here to stop the count."

Those were the words John Bolton yelled as he burst into a Tallahassee library on Saturday, Dec. 9, 2000, where local election workers were recounting ballots cast in Florida's disputed presidential race between George W. Bush and Al Gore.

Bolton was one of the pack of lawyers for the Republican presidential ticket who repeatedly sought to shut down recounts of the ballots from Florida counties before those counts revealed that Gore had actually won the state's electoral votes and the presidency.

Heathens!

Thanks to David Craig Simpson

Karl Rove’s 12 rules to gain Power

1. Use surrogates to attack your opponent. Never let your guy (or yourself, if you happen to be running) rip into the other guy. Find some lackey who’s more than willing to get vicious ugly for you. Your guy will look like a disinterested prince.

2. Leak harmful information. This is pretty much your basic opposition-research stuff. But leak it; don’t announce it. And certainly it helps to develop friendly relations with journalists of a whorish bent. Devastating information on your opponent isn’t worth much if you can’t get the word out.

3. Turn rumor into fact. Better yet, start a rumor about your opponent and use the media whores with whom you’ve developed a good relationship to hammer away at whatever you’ve invented. Before long everyone will at least assume that where there’s smoke there’s fire.

4. Use well-organized 3rd-party groups to make allegations. This is closely related to #3. In short, if you can find a Swift-Boat kind of outfit to go libelous on your behalf, do it. Also see #1 – surrogates and the disinterested prince.

5. Funnel money to a 3rd-party candidate similar in ideology to your opponent’s to dilute your opponent’s vote. Self-explanatory.

6. Use ties to law enforcement to launch bogus investigations against your opponent. You’ll need to be comfortably in bed with a high-powered D.A., though, so this tactic isn’t for the chronically un-empowered. You also can’t harbor any compunctions about bankrupting an innocent person through legal expenses or even sending him to jail and destroying his family. This is rather big-league stuff, and not for the squeamish.

7. Associate your guy’s political positions with God and flag. Be creative. If needed, rewatch Animal House for inspiration, the part in which Otter defends his incredibly guilty pals before a college court in a rip-roaring burst of offended patriotism. It can be done.

8. Always position your opponent as an agent of the status quo, your guy as the candidate for change. Self-explanatory.

9. Build your messages on what the public already believes in. Closely related to #7. Don’t ever try to introduce the electorate to something unfamiliar or convince it of something new. Another angle is to play on preexisting prejudices. If the public hates freckled people, your guy hates freckled people. Always has.

10. “Explaining is losing.” This is the only direct quote I’ve lifted from the book, because it is key, absolutely critical. If your guy has to explain anything – his policies, his past, anything – then your guy is playing a losing game. Voters in general don’t want to be burdened with policy details and candidates certainly don’t want to get mired in personal explanations. Just forget explaining anything -- anything at all -- and move on. It’ll work. You’ll be amazed.

11. Use push polling. Again, this is high-powered stuff for the monied pros. Don’t call registered voters and ask if they like so-and-so’s position on something. Call and ask if they like the satanic plan your Illuminati opponent wants to shove through Congress should he get there with all his corrupt campaign cash. You get the poll results you want, and better yet, you leave the right impression of your opponent in the minds of the questioned.

12. Pick off special-interest support for your opponent. In other words, be a hypocritical flip-flopper like all get out (and don’t bother explaining it). Bush’s decision before the 2004 campaign on erecting steel tariffs is an excellent example.

Thanks to P.M. Carpenter

The Bill Frist Commandments

Thanks to uggabugga

"Open" Meeting

Thanks to YubaNet.com

Strange Bedfellows

Let's see who agrees with whom on social issues. This should be real interesting!

Abortion Rights
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Prayer in School
Liberals - Opposes
Osama bin Laden - Favors
NeoConservative - Favors

Separation of Church & State
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Censorship
Liberals - Opposes
Osama bin Laden - Favors
NeoConservative - Favors

Interpretation of Religious Scripture
Liberals - Not Literal
Osama bin Laden - Literal
NeoConservative - Literal

Women's Rights
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Death with Dignity
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Theory of Evolution
Liberals - Accepts
Osama bin Laden - Rejects
Rejects

United Nations
Liberals - Supports
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Gay Rights
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Contraceptives
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Sex Education
Liberals - Favors
Osama bin Laden - Opposes
NeoConservative - Opposes

Severe Penalties for Drug Use
Liberals - Opposes
Osama bin Laden - Favors
NeoConservative - Favors

Corporal Punishment
Liberals - Opposes
Osama bin Laden - Favors
NeoConservative - Favors

Thinks There is Only One TRUE God
Liberals - No
Osama bin Laden - Yes
NeoConservative - Yes

Dissent = Disloyalty
Liberals - Disagrees
Osama bin Laden - Agrees
NeoConservative - Agrees

Thanks to Thought Crimes

Those evil evil nurses.

Nurse interviews were part of Hannity's repetoire this week while trying to discredit Michael Schiavo and the assessment that Terri was PVS. The nurses claimed that Terri was responsive; not PVS and Michael was harsh and uncaring. One nurse claimed that she found an empty insulin vile in the room but was dismissed after reporting it and Michael Schiavo asked "Is that B..... dead yet?"

According to Florida records only one of these nurses is licensed by the State of Florida, Carla Sauer-Iyer. Two other guest nurses, Heidi Law and Trudy Capone, are not licensed as an RN or CNA in Florida.

Check for yourself Here.

The Belgian Waffle

Belgian trainers helping police to understand body language have caused a row by likening George Bush's facial expressions to a chimpanzee's.

Interior Minister Patrick Dewael said he was unaware of the pictures when he signed a letter promoting the training package for police dealing with unruly soccer fans, and said the idea was "of bad taste", Het Laatste Nieuws daily reported.

The training presentation pictured the U.S. president's face in various expressions beside photographs of a chimpanzee, the paper showed on its front page, in what was meant to be a humorous introduction to the subject of reading expressions.

Dewael's office was not immediately available for comment.